Communication ABC’s

Effective Communication

Communication seems like it should be simple, however when not done well, the result is often misunderstanding and conflict. Communication is not just talking, it is an exchange of symbols, all of which are open to interpretation.  More than just exchanging information, it’s about understanding the intention behind a message. So how can we be sure that the message we are communicating is the message others receive? Or vice versa? By practicing effective communication. Effective communication helps us better understand a person or situation and enables us to resolve conflict, build trust, improve decision making and create environments where problem solving and creativity flourish. The key is in the words we choose to use, our body language and understanding that of others while practicing active listening skills. Communication is a two-way street and improving our skills involves both how we send and receive messages. Effective communication may not come naturally, but it is a skill that can be developed. Like working a muscle, the more practice you put into it, the better the results you will see.

Communication ABC’s

Avoid interrupting or trying to redirect the conversation to your concerns. Listening is not the same as waiting for your turn to speak. You are actually attempting to stop the speaker in order to deflect attention away from them and onto yourself. You cannot concentrate on what someone else is saying when you are thinking of what to say next.

Be careful of your thoughts, they may become words. Do not say the first thing that pops into your head, focus on the meaning of what you want to communicate. So before you speak, THINK! T-is it true? H-is it helpful? I-is it inspiring? N-is it necessary? K-is it kind? If what you are going to say does not follow these guidelines, keep it to yourself or reword it to deliver a meaningful message.

Concentrate on what the speaker is saying to you. Don’t just hear the speaker, listen. The art of listening is crucial to communication and requires focus. It means not only paying attention to their words, but how they are saying it and the use of body language. When one chooses to not listen messages are easily misunderstood and communication breaks down.

Deliver your message clearly. Unless the speaker is clear in what they say, the message will be lost. You need to be precise and use simple, easy to understand language. While using lingo to communicate may be common, it is important to take the extra time and effort to communicate specifically what you mean. Be careful to not use jargon or nonspecific words like “stuff” or “things.” Your audience should not have to work hard to understand your message.

Empathize, try seeing things from another’s point-of-view. When communicating, try not to be judgmental or biased due to your own preconceived ideas. When you master empathy you can communicate on a much deeper level and genuinely understand people. You move from being surprised by what people do to understanding their behavior. That’s because you have made a shift from assuming you know what they are thinking and feeling to knowing what they are really experiencing. Put yourself in their shoes and you will better understand their message.

Find your voice. Trying to be someone you’re not can be tiring, so showcase who you are and be yourself. Use language that is yours and let your values be known when you are speaking. People respect authenticity, speak with your own voice. Say what you mean and mean what you say!

Give feedback to check your understanding. The purpose of feedback is to promote understanding between the messenger and the receiver. If there appears to be a disconnect in the conversation, reflect what has been said by paraphrasing. Instead of simply repeating what the speaker said try using “What I am hearing is…” Let the speaker know what he/she’s words mean to you so that you can better clarify and understand their message.

Using these simple communication ABC’s can improve your skills and help you become an effective communicator.